My friend's response was that perhaps I should just allow myself to be done, that if I learned what I needed to learn in 345 days then I can call it finished. She gently suggested that I shouldn't force it, that doing it out of obligation would be less meaningful. She made very good points and I know she meant well, but the more I think about it, it's so not what I needed to hear. I guess what I'm needing is support from my biggest fans, shouting their encouraging words and showing belief in me as I enter the tiring last leg of this journey.
I've come too far to quit now. There will be a natural ending, but this is not it. I'm trying very hard not to get worked up at the lack of interest, understanding and encouragement from most of my nearest and dearest. And I have to remind myself, it's important to me and that's what matters. I'm doing this for myself. I have to encourage myself to keep going. I have to find my own meaning in my own time. This is the time to muster up all my courage and intrinsic motivation. I will continue to find joy and meaning in every step left on my journey. I will cross the finish line, even if no one is watching. And then I will celebrate as if it's all 33 birthdays packed into one, for the opportunity of constant rebirth that I've given to myself.