Thursday, May 16, 2013

336/365: The Only Failure

Eeeeeeek!! Today we found out that the guitar my husband built was accepted into the Design in Wood exhibit at the Del Mar Fair! We have been waiting to hear about his submission for weeks. His first try and it's in! The fact that his instrument was chosen is a testament to his talents, but I'm just as proud of him for finishing the piece and submitting it.

Last summer, we visited the fair to eat deep fried randomness and to admire the art, photography and woodwork exhibits. We both left saying, "I can do that! I can create a piece to submit for show at the fair!" We both vowed we would enter this year, he a guitar for Design in Wood and me a piece of mixed media art. While my husband was busy designing, creating and learning from the process, I allowed the fair deadline to come and go without much thought. "I'm not in that place right now," I think I told myself.

He came through for himself...and I found some excuse to not even try. The only failure is in not trying. Isn't that what they say? Well I have failed royally.

Probably because I know the work and passion that went into it, and because I adore the crap out of him and rejoice in his rejoicing, the prickly feelings aren't surfacing right away. It is easy to focus my attention on where it is really deserved, the man who has something to show for his efforts. But I suspect my inner critic will be dropping by soon to give me a good bashing. Or maybe I'll get lucky and  learn a lesson on creative commitment from my favorite teacher.

So tonight we toasted glasses and ate our dinner in the wood shop, right there at Rodney's work bench, in the company of his band saw and belt sander. It seemed appropriate. I'm smiling from ear to ear in admiration. He has discovered and acknowledged his talent, and committed to his focus. His will to create is stronger than I've ever known it to be. He's making things happen for himself.

I want to be like him when I grow up.

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